As many of you might know I lived for 17 years in Spain before I came to Sweden. And since almost nobody could pronounce my name, I used Agnes – English translation of it. I even used it for my photography studio: “Agnes Perspective”. It didn´t matter what I did, nothing seemed to work and my creativity got stagnant. Then I went through the dark night of the soul and it was brough to my attention in few occasions that I should go back to my original name. The energy behind Agnes is closed, opposite to Agnieszka´s which is open and inviting. A name is like a compressed story about who you are or who you’re meant to become and we´ve been given specific one for a reason. When spoken out loud it produces sound waves, giving it different frequency, rhythm, and emotional tone. If repeated daily, it anchors identity and shapes how others perceive and address you due to collective associations. Every time someone says your name, your brain lights up, your body respond and your sense of “self” is reinforced. If you change it, your behavior, confidence, even life direction often changes too.

I´ve got lost on my path and didn´t live my authentic self to the fullest at this moment in life. I´ve shrinked to fit others and started hiding behind a false identity. I started to blame them for not accepting and appreciating me for who I was and the truth is I, myself, was not happy with who I became. I didn´t want to be called too much, too weird, too controversial and not enough at the same time, so I dimed my light gradually thinking that something was wrong with me. My life seemed great from the outside, but deep down I was dying. Life took care of it and killed the false world around me instead. To set me free and put me back on the right path, surrounding me with the right tribe. I could finally fully embrace who I really was.

Here, up north, people find my name beautiful and make an effort to learn how to pronounce it correctly. Coming here felt like coming home in so many ways.

And it´s only recently that I discovered other meanings behind my name:

• AGNI – is the Vedic god of fire, transformation, sacrifice, divine transmission and messenger between worlds.
• ESZ – as a sound (Esh) – in Hebrew means fire and historically connects to breath, spirit, movement, whispering forces.
• KA – in Ancient Egyptian belief was a vital essence, life-force, spiritual double, the energy that continues after death.

Putting it all together Agnieszka energetically means: the conscious sacred flame embodied into living form.

This painting is a tribute to that and it´s about claiming inner fire without apology. Agni, the female dragon, is the flame that transforms matter into spirit. Like an artist transforms emotion into image. Story into symbol. Silence into presence. She stands as guardian of what is essential: truth, dignity, creative force. Before her, what is false falls away. I chose the Song: “I Am the Fire” by Halestorm to accompany this piece, because standing in one’s own flame is better than shrinking.

“Am I brave enough?
Am I strong enough?
To follow the desire
That burns from within
To push away my fear
To stand where I’m afraid
I am through with this
Cuz I am more than this
I promise to myself
Alone and no one else
My flame is rising higher
I am the fire!”

Now is your turn to step into your power and answer to your flame!